Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Blog 6:Helping Judgements

Dr. Brene Brown said, if you can't ask for help without self-judgement, it is impossible to help others without judgement.

I love this quote. I had never thought about things this way. I am a mess, I am one of the first people to tell others that I am a mess. I go to counseling, and I am not ashamed that I go to counseling. Heck, I need counseling, I don't know where I would be if I didn't have that in my life. And I see no judgment in that. Usually mental health is something that most people don't have control over, and I see no shame in needing guidance and someone to talk to.

However, the more I thought about it, I realized it applied to more than just counseling. I know that I would judge myself if I had receive SNAP benefits. I would look down upon myself if I had to receive other forms of public assistance to make ends meet. So what does this say about me? Am I judging the people who do need these services?

In a way, I think yes, even though I hate that thought. The American culture that we live in is all about pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and making your own success, I tend to see people who need public assistance as people who just aren't "trying hard enough". And yes, I do cognitively know that previous statement is false and ridiculous. I also know this attitude isn't something I can change over night.

Shame is when the reality of who you are does not meet the expectation you have for yourself/who you think you should be. So I think that I take the shame I would feel and create a judgement of myself. I then portray my expectations onto others, not the same expectations that I have for myself though.

It will be a continual battle to fight against judging myself and others. Knowing that only then, can I truly help others.

Observation: AISD created a tip line (connected to the school police department) for students and staff to report bullying.

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